“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.” Nelson Mandela
Those keeping an eye on this website You’ll know that I have a serious problem when it comes to resentment. It’s fair to say that I have an unhealthy relationship to it, as I seek to be resentful of people in different ways.
That was until I came across the quote by Nelson Mandela. It really helped change my perspective on things by realising how I’m the one who is suffering the most.
And this is the truth of the situation. I am drinking my own poison which I’ve made myself. I’d like to think it will bring me joy, but it never does. It always ends up with me feeling worse about myself.
I feel like I’m in a positive place at the moment. I feel more positive about the future and more content about the present. I’ve moaned a lot on this site about the challenges I’ve had with academia. But rather than comparing myself to others, and how they’re doing in their job, I’ve come to accept that I am where I am and I have to make the best of it. The reality is no job is perfect.
There’s a bigger message to take home here. Not only is there the perfect job there is no such thing as the perfect life. Rather than comparing myself to others, I’m looking at what they have, and what I don’t have (resentment and envy) I’ve come to accept my current situation rather than fight it.
I also come to realise that the things which used to bring me joy in work No longer bring me joy now. Instead, Things have shifted, and I’m now focused on my family. I feel like this provides me with true, meaning and purpose in life - not my job.